Updating a tablegrid after deleting an entry via context menu

I have decided to allow an end user to delete an item from a tablegrid  by right clicking and selecting 'delete'. This is purely because my survey of end users were concerned about using a  button to delete the entry and they felt it safer to deliberately highlight an entry and then right click.

I need to place formX.tablegridX.dbUpdate  somewhere.

My problems are:

1. I would like to update this table grid to reflect the new data result - currently it refreshes but without the data filtered.

2. I would like to update a different table grid to reflect the deletion of this item.

I can't fathom how to update either table grid to reflect automatically the new data after using the context menu.

I've tried the following events for the 'delete' table grid:

OnChange - this does nothing in this context.
OnAfterEdit -  ditto
OnMouseUp - ditto

Obviously once I know what event the right click delete option can trigger I can then reload the delete table grid with the filtered data rather than the complete database.

Is there a way perhaps I could have the right click delete menu, trigger a hidden button action which I could use to reload both tablegrids?

Does anyone have a solution?

PS: I should add the right click delete option is via the tablegrid properties in th eobject inspecter and AllowDelete = True